Alicia Ferrell
Pamela Yoko Melton
Kelley Sanders

Shelley Rhodes
Tanja Supon
Chris Shirley
Kirsten Gilliam Mullis

Dee Dee Coursey
Christi Healan
DrFaustus666@aol.com (no name provided)
Ariana Siennick
Chris McCormick
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Shelley Rhodes

The rhetorical situation: a bar in Savannah’s Marketplace, 2 am Saturday morning. David, who is currently studying rhetoric at AASU, has had one to many drinks and the last just came up all over a very muscular man, who boxes and is six inches taller than David. The disgusted man is also drunk and pissed off that his girlfriend just left him (not to mention the vomit oozing down his back.) David has about two second before he’s carried out of the bar—in a body bag. 

“I stand before you guilty—guilty[1] of overindulgence, and ill manners, and failure to understand how you must feel with my heaving[2] running down your back, and bad timing… and exceedingly bad timing.[3] I stand before you acknowledging my fate. What is that fate you may ask, my dear Adonis[MSR1] [4]? That fate is unknown.[5] I may live to see my mother, my father, the morning sunrise, a spring day, a dog’s tail wagging. Allow me to show you some family pictures.[6]  

I stand before you[7] awaiting the fall of the ax. I can see you are most unhappy with this situation.[8] I must admit, if our roles were reversed, I would also be annoyed.[9] Indeed, the bar tender failed to warn me that this drink would make me sick. The bartender failed to tell me that it would induce vomiting.[10] Indeed, he failed to tell me it was poison!

I can see you are a stout, strong, and sensible[11] [12] individual with a strong sense of right and wrong, so I am sure that you will judge me according to my most innocent of intentions.

 Lastly, I am sure you tire of this humorous drama[13]—and will soon laugh as you tell your friends[14]—so I will leave you to your beer and sorrow, and non-violent activities, and I will pass out of death sturdy gaze—and tell my mother how much I love her.”[15]

[1] Anadiplosis    [2] Euphemism     [3] Polysyndeton       [4] Antonomasia        [5] Hyphophora         [6] Pathic Appeal      [7] Epimone      [8] Understatement        [9] Ethopoeia  
[10] Invective      11 Alliteration       [12] Tricolon            [13] Oxymoron          [14] Parenthesis          [15] Metaphor
[1] Anadiplosis    [1] Euphemism     [1] Polysyndeton      [1] Antonomasia      [1] Hyphphora        [1] Pathic Appeal         [1] Epimone
[1] Understatement      [1] Ethopoeia       [1] Invective      11 Alliteration     [1] Tricolon             
[1] Oxymoron             [1] Parenthesis
[1] Metaphor

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Tanja Supon

 My dear friend (hyperbaton)
You act more child than a child
Your voice, annoying, two hackling hens, nails on blackboard sound  (tricolon/crot)
Your hair, perfectly brown like dog shit (paronomasia)
Your nose, long enough to ski jump off and the lawn needs cutting (metaphor)
Your eyes, best feature, I can see hell (assonance)
You are a friend and I love you dearly(epanalepsis)
Dear(antonomasia) you have uncontrollable flaws
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Chris Shirley

To my sister, on her wedding day: 

Oh my family, how can I bear to give such a speech as this? (1) My little sister, marrying- (2) I am not here today to discount the worth of my future in-laws, nor am I here to tell you what slick, greasy, manipulative son of a wimpled idle-headed pignut he husband to be is. (3,4) I’m here to-Irving, screw it: your disgustingness, your debauchery, your lack of humanity are indescribable! (6-9) You infect my eyes, you cankerous, codpiece-sniffing foot-licker. (10-11.3) What is the point of this invective? To see what your reaction would be. (12) Man, I was just playin’ when I said I hate you, I love you man! (13) This family welcomes you, just as you welcome this family. (14) She stole your heart, and your fortune, and your fortune is not that you now have this extended family, a family that will always be there to call on for help, and help you to spend said fortune we will! (15-21) But Irving, you are a good Romeo, and you are a decent person, and you are a smart man, and you will be a good father. (22-27) So in closing, I ask you this: those of you here who heard what I said, did you take me seriously? (28-20) Are you so quick to believe the bad in Irving that you would accept what I said? (31)

1-rhetorical question

2-aposiopesis

3-apophasis

4-bdelygmia

5-aporia

6-apostrophe

7-asyndetic tri-colon (technically two tropes?)

8-auxesis

9-invective

10-metaphor

11.1-epimone

11.2-bdelygmia

11.3-asendetic tri-colon

12-hypophora

13-antithesis

14-chiasmus

15-syllepsis

16-zeugma

17-adadiplosis

18-gradatio

19-epanalepsis

20-loose sentence

21-hysteron proteron

22-antonomasia

23-polysendetic tetra-colon (technically two tropes?)

24-isocolon

25-parison

26-parallelism

27-ironic

28-apostrophe

29-quasi-polyptoton

30-rhetorical question

31-epiplexis

32-This speech is all about kairos
________________________________________

Kirsten Gilliam Mullis

The People on My Row in Rhetoric Class 

Kasey Ray, my stunning sister, has brown eyes, light brown hair, has a dog named Buster, strawberries she likes, is an English Communications major.  [appositive, accumulation, asyndeton, alliteration, hyperbaton, loose sentence] 

Alicia Ferrell, my flashy friend, has brown eyes, blond/brown hair, has a dog named William Shakespeare, milkshakes from Cold Stone Creamery she likes, and keeps flip-flopping with what she wants her degree to be.   [appositive, accumulation, asyndeton, hyperbaton, alliteration, loose sentence] 

Dee Dee Coursey, my flirty friend, has hazel eyes, dark brown hair, cats named Powder, Arabica, and Mystikal, café mochas she likes, is an English Communications major. [appositive, accumulation, alliteration,  asyndeton, hyperbaton,  loose sentence] 

These wickedly wonderful women are three of the most awesome people in the universe.  [alliteration, hyperbole]  If they were not my friends my life would be as mournful as a funeral each day. [hyperbole]  If they needed anything I would tell them, “A friend in need is a friend indeed.”  [anaphora, cliché]  These ladies are like three rays of sunshine. [simile] These ladies are awfully clever in their Rhetoric assignments. [anaphora, antiphrasis]  I will not mention that these lovely ladies are kind to all classmates. [apophasis, alliteration]  Don’t you think they’re totally, totally tubular too? [Rhetorical question, epizeuxis, alliteration]

____________________________________

English 5730 is taught by Dr. Richard Nordquist.
Armstrong Atlantic State University
Savannah, Georgia 31419
912-921-5991 

02 March 2005